“My Dad is Albert Einstein,” Pitcher Thinks To Himself When Dad Yelled “Just Throw Strikes”

HOOVER, AL — After issuing his eighth walk of the game during a steamy second-inning meltdown, 12U pitcher Cody Smith stared into the outfield and briefly questioned the very nature of intelligence itself. 

“I really wasn’t sure what to do next,” Cody said. “None of my pitches were working and the coaches didn’t have another pitcher to relieve me.  And that’s when it happened.  The voice I had heard my whole life suddenly rose up above the clatter and shouted the most mind-blowing, intellectual, parallel-universe-altering wisdom known to man—" JUST THROW STRIKES SON!”

Spectators reported a visible and immediate change in Cody’s posture, facial expression, and swagger.  “It was like... a lightbulb went off,” said Cody, noticeably emotional after the game. “All this time, I’d been trying to aim it, think too much, use mechanics—when really, I just needed to throw strikes. That’s it. That’s the whole secret.  My dad... he’s a genius.”

Cody, now referring to his father as “Coach Einstein,” said he plans to have the phrase stitched into his glove, tattooed on his forearm (eventually), and possibly written in cursive above his future locker at Vanderbilt.

“I mean, think about it,” Cody said, staring off in wonder. “Why didn’t anyone else tell me this? Why didn’t Coach say it? Why didn’t YouTube say it? He just stood up and said the truth. Just throw strikes. Wow.”

Fellow teammates confirmed that “Just throw strikes” is a staple of Doug’s in-game coaching repertoire, often followed by such classics as “Settle down!” and “You’ve got this!”—none of which have actually lowered his son's ERA.

As of press time, Cody had walked two more batters but insisted he was “mentally in a much better place now.”